I had a panic attack while making dinner tonight. I had forgotten to take my meds the night before and my anxiety was quite high throughout the day. I tried to hide within myself by curling up under a blanket and sitting with the anxious knots. Feeling it bubble up from beneath the surface, I … Continue reading Panic Attack: Dinner Edition
When people set goals, they think about what they want to be, or where they want to be in a year, two years, perhaps five. They see into a distant future and dig their heels into that goal. Some days I have to set goals to get through hours, minutes, or seconds in order to … Continue reading Depression: Goals
She once stood atop a mountain. Her arms outstretched towards the clouds as she balanced on the snowcapped peak. Cool winds had wiped by her gracefully; dancing with her. Euphoria had been seeping from her pores and sunshine exploded from the blood in her veins. She once stood atop a mountain. Until someone—something—pushed her off … Continue reading She Stood Atop A Mountain
She thinks about killing herself the way most people think about the weather. Or a loved one. Or a favorite TV show. Sometimes the thoughts are fleeting, passing through her mind like a radio station that is never quite clear as it fades in and out. Other times the thoughts are persistent. Sometimes, they're loud; … Continue reading Chanting Drum Line
Besides the pulling that tore at her heart and wrapped itself tightly around her chest, she was empty. It had taken her nearly an hour, but she had finally made it from the bed to the couch in the dully lit room. The sunlight hardly poked through the blinds that covered the dusty windows. The … Continue reading Monsters Inside: A Bipolar Mind
Nikki Haase: Author/Writer 